Friday, October 26, 2007

How I Met My Hunny - The Saga *chuckle*

I don't know why my posts be sounding like tv shows. Dayum the tv must be "mind controlling" me. LOL. *chuckle* Anyway, I was thinking about my family and what not and my Hunny. And sometimes, well all the time, I forget how we actually met. It's not like we've been together since high school, like some of my married friends. It just seems like we've ALWAYS been together. Maybe all them babies we got have something to do with that feeling. LOL.

Well, this is how the story goes. Remember BlackVoices.com? Yes I met my Hunny on the internet. LOL. It was back in 1998, in December. I'd first heard of blackvoices from a coworker. You know we were suppose be working but were sending each other IM's and sh*t. *shakin head*. So she sends me this link to a website where you could make a "web page" and sh*t. So I was like cool, I want my own web page too. Plus I wanted to be fass and put my pic on the net. LOL. So I put this pic on bv page. I had taken that in a placed called Jack London Square in Oakland. I think they tore down the old wooden structure part of it where this pic was taken. My azz didn't know NOTHING about doing no web pages (and still don't). I couldn't even scan an image. So I had to have Kinco's do it. LOL. That was a hot mess. And of course I messed up the dayum picture messing with it. Don't ask me what I was doing cuz I don't know. So I was all excited cuz I was meeting cool people. I don't know, it seemed different back then. It's folks that I met who went to some of the same schools I did and who were REAL people. None of this "I don't-want-to-use-my-real-name and-put-up-pics-cuz-I-get-stalked and-let-me-be-vague-about-my-job" type of sh*t that seems to be the NORM for the internet today. Not saying folks need to give they mamma maiden name and ssi# but dayum, a mo'fo act like if you know what they look like or their first name biblical revelations gonna come to pass. *chuckle to self*

Now this is where the hubby and I get confused because I swear he first contacted me via my bv page when I put up that first pic, which was in Dec of 1998. Well he says that he wasn't even in Cali yet and didn't contact me until April of 1999. And by then I had a BlackPlanet page. LOL. Most people didn't even have home computer back then. I didn't either, my parents did (cuz that's were I was living). And they also had HELLA SLOW azz dial up connection BEFORE AOL. LOL. Or maybe right when AOL was tryna take off. They used Netscape (dayum is that sh*t still around?). Anyway, he contacted me and sent me a funny graphic pic thing that was comic book style. It really made me laugh. I suppose he was tryna get my attention, well it worked.

After a series of emails back and forth he FINALLY asked me for my phone number. We seemed to have started off very slowly. He was so busy with work and traveling all over the place that we only talked on the phone about once a week to every other week. Well me being the generator that I am, I was waiting to respond. Meaning I was WAITING for him to ask me out. Don't know why, that's just my make up and how I roll. Not cuz he a man and I'm a woman, I just wait and then after I wait, I act. But my hubby is a generator too. So he also waits. LOL. Starting to wonder how we EVER got together. So thru all this waiting and only talking on the phone about 4 times a month, not a whole lot of progress was made. He's doing his thing and I'm doing mine. It wasn't a bad thing. I did find him quite interesting, and intelligent, funny, easy going, he had a GREAT phone voice (very deep and sophisticated sounding *wink*) and world traveled. His azz just NEVER asked me out. And I didn't want to presume that he just thought I was the sh*t and couldn't wait to be in my presence. I figured he just enjoyed talking to me on the phone from time to time. Funny thing I could never put my finger on back then is that he ALWAYS asked me what I had planned for next week, or the week-end etc. And I was thinking he wanted to know, so that he could ask me out. I'd tell him "nothing" or just hanging out with family or something. And he'd be like "oh that's cool" but didn't ask me out. *shakin head* And as I said before, I was the type (still am) who WAITS. So I didn't ask him either.

Okay so all thru 1999 and 2000 we had these great phone conversations and emails from time to time. Well I think my phone number changed because I'd moved back into my parents home and I was no longer on BlackVoices (cuz by then it was starting to get raunchy). Plus I think I met all the folks I needed to meet. So toward the end of 2000 he sent out a mass email asking if anyone knew of some places that were for rent. He was moving and was tired of paying high azz rent for his apartment. He used to live in these apartments in Oakland called The Lakeshore. Now them apartments were old as my parents but for some reason them sh*ts were expensive. I'm still tryna figure that one out. Well I responded to the email, cuz he was still a cool person (even tho by that time I'd given up any idea that we'd ever meet in real life). He replied to my response and thus we started to chat a bit more frequently.

Since my birthday was coming up in January, I started to prepare what I wanted to do. Every year for about the past 5 years I'd been sending out e-mails and birthday reminders about my birthday and made jokes about if folks wanted to "contribute" to my b-day fund I gladly accepted all forms of payment EXCEPT checks. LOL. Everybody got a kick out of it and I usually got alot of e-cards and b-day well wishes and sometimes some "not so cheap folks" offered to take me out. Well my hubby (who was not my hubby then) was included in those emails. He responded that he wanted to take me out for my birthday and that we should exchange numbers AGAIN. He also stated that THIS time he was not letting another opportunity to meet me pass by again. Or rather he said, he wasn't gonna wait another 3 years before we met. I agreed and we made plans to hang out.

So now it's 2001 and my birthday time is nearing and we talk from time to time and engrave in stone a day that he'll come pick me up and take me out. We agree to meet that Thursday night after I get off work. Well I actually wasn't working yet. I was just "working" at my moms office until my teaching gig cleared (meaning my drug test, finger prints, physical, etc.). And NO my mother did not pay my azz either. LOL. That Thursday of our "first meet" finally came. Since my birthday is in the DEAD of winter it's usually pretty cold and no one really wants to hang out. That day it has rained ALL day long and was pretty chilly. I was tired and really didn't want to hang out. So I kinda thought to myself, that if he doesn't call me today to confirm AGAIN then I won't call him until like Sunday, cuz I was tired. So I get home and there were a few messages on my answering machine from him. By then I was outta my clothes and practically into my pajamas. Well before my azz could lay down good, guess who called? It was my hubby. He was calling to see if I still wanted to hang out and if so, what would be a good time to pick me up? I figured why not go out, because I did want to meet him after all this time and plus I was hungry. We made plans to hang out about an hour from then. I gave him my address and gave him exact directions to my parents house.

Now mind you, I ain't NEVER seen ol' boy before in person. We've only seen pics of each other. So I'm a lil nervous cuz for some reason I've really wanted to meet him, we just never seemed able to hook up. Or rather we never really tried. So my Hunny rings the doorbell and I am pleasantly surprised. Cuz the one picture he'd ever sent did not do him justice. So we hugged and smiled. After we got over being a lil nervous it was good. It's kinda weird to meet someone in person that you've had communication with for about 3 years but have never actually seen them face to face. So it sorta feels like knowing somebody without actually knowing them. Well I didn't want to go far because we actually both were tired. He admitted that he had reservations about going out too since it was so wet and a work day. My parents live in east oakland so there is a mall close by (no not Eastmont Mall for those who from the Bay) and a few restaurants to choose from. I picked Chevy's cuz it's a cool place to get food and drinks and just hang out.

This is our actual first date picture. My Hunny was video taping (something that I now know he LOVES to do). I don't know what was so funny. It seems we were laughing all thru the night. I felt like I'd known him for YEARS. *after thought* I guess in a way I had since we'd first actually contacted each other back in 1998. So needless to day we closed Chevy's down, cuz they close about 10pm or so on week day nights (unless it's a Friday). And after having soooo much fun I wasn't ready to go home. It's a trip because in the beginning I was too tired to go out and towards the end I didn't want to leave. He was feeling the same way. So after we hung out there for awhile we decided to do some "skinny dippin* LOL. Lord knows why I took him to some dayum hot tubs up the street from the mall. Maybe he slipped something in my drink. LOL. So we ended up splashing around in a dayum hot tub in our birthday suits. We acted like we were already together and not on a first date. How many folks can say that they saw someone naked that they were attracted too but didn't do no sexin? We were respectful of each other, as one could get. *chuckle* And just really enjoyed being in each others company. So as the night turned into the early a.m. we both knew that he had to get me home so that we could start our days with a least a few hours of sleep.

Well, Friday came and my hubby called me like he said he would and we both had such a WONDERFUL time the day before that we wanted to hang out again. He wanted to pick me up again on Friday but since it was my birthday week, I'd made other plans. So we just talked. I went out to some club with girlfriends and called him the next day. We couldn't hang out Saturday because he was working and made other plans for that day as well. Plus I had my moms annual fund raiser dinner to attend that evening too. We didn't see each other again until my actual birthday. I had dinner plans that Sunday with my family and after dinner we planned to hang out. He said he wouldn't be right if he didn't get to see me on my birthday. So we hooked up Sunday night. He took me out for a birthday drink. Which neither of us drank much cuz we were so busy running our mouths. Of course we hung out until the wee morning hours and ended up at Denny's about 3am just talking. Neither of us wanted to leave but he had work the next day and so did I. Meanwhile, we are now talking on the phone EVERYDAY and sending emails during the day and always making plans to spend time together. I think we must have hung out about every night. And once the week-end came that was a guarantee that we were gonna hang out. He always seemed to know of something that was going on. I suppose it was about 3 weeks after my birthday that we felt like we were really serious about each other.

It was right around Valentine's Day. I've no idea what we did aside from just being in each other's presence. But that's when it happened. He asked me to marry him. Wild huh? No I didn't have a ring or anything like that and no I wasn't pregnant. It must have been magic, or karma, just meant to be. Of course I said yes. But it was this totally informal thing. I felt like a little kid or something who just got the greatest prize outta the cracker jack box. We kept it to ourselves and just continued to spend more and more time together. We were both struggling cuz teachers don't get paid ANY money at all and he was feeling the pinch of the dot.com explosion that had most of his friends packin up and heading back east. Well February turned into March and March into May. And that's when I finally made the formal introduction to my parents. Oh they knew who he was and that I was "dating" they just didn't know all the details. My parents were having a huge memorial day barbq at their house and invited him. I was nervous because I knew I was serious about him but I'm not sure everyone else knew how serious I was (or at least my parents didn't know). And they definetly didn't know we were engaged (cuz we kept that to ourselves - I suppose it was more a spiritual thing vs. something that was superficial and flashy). Needless to say it was not a big deal and my folks were happy to meet him. If I was happy then they were too.

Now as time went on, we doing our thing as man and woman. By now we're making plans to live together. He has a place around lake merritt in oakland with the best living room view of the lake one could have (like across the street). But he had a room mate. Their duplex was huge but sometimes you want your own privacy without running into someone else. Well as luck would have it I ended up "unofficial" living with him because I was over everyday. Meaning after I was off work, I was at his house, especially during the summer. Summer school was only a month and the rest of my time was free. Not to mention summer school let out about 1:30pm. And since he worked from home, that was all the more time we could see each other. I suppose I officially moved into his place in October 2001. Meaning that's when he gave me my own key AND I also got my own set of keys to his truck.(which I was scared to drive cuz that mo'fo was hella big) Yeah I always heard that brotha's on the East coast don't play when it comes to a woman they want. If they like you, then that's it. They gonna make you theirs. And that's especially true when they venture from the east coast out west, cuz brothas out here are laid back. And I guess the women are too. So when a brotha step to you all "Eric B. and Rakim" style you can't help but swoon. LOL.

Well needless to say it was around that time when I officially moved in with my Hunny that I became pregnant with Baby A I aka Princess Senayet. So now we need to step it up cuz we're gonna have a child. This was something new to both of us, cuz neither of us had ever had a child before and didn't have the slightest clue as to what to do next. We were both in our 30's and actually WANTED to have children together. It was very untraditional the way we did it. We were living together having fun and enjoying being with each other just thinking about our lives together. So now I'm pregnant and we kinda get excited. I was more excited than him in the beginning. But I guess as the idea of a baby grew on him, he got more excited than me.

So here it is only 9 months since we've ever laid eyes on each other, live and in person, and we're making a family for real and true. *whew* Sh*t I might be a generator but my azz move fast, LOL. Well we told our families and most folks were excited. And others have raised eyebrows cuz they thinking I'm about to be a "baby mama" *chuckle to self*

Okay back to the present cuz that's all the reminiscing I'm typing for now. I ain't into long azz posts so now I'm tired. Same time, next time. ha! Enjoy.

*smoochies* - Baby Mama Richardson

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8 Comments:

  • At 5:33 PM, October 26, 2007, Blogger *Tanyetta* said…

    Awwwwwwww...and you still together (like the couple on living color) :)

     
  • At 8:34 PM, October 26, 2007, Blogger Raquel said…

    ..sigh..

    (except for the part where your butt was in a hottub naked with him on your first date! I was CRACKIN up that your brave butt posted that!)

     
  • At 1:34 AM, October 27, 2007, Blogger AR Gal said…

    That was a really great story!

    Thanks for sharing!

     
  • At 1:27 PM, October 28, 2007, Blogger Ray said…

    Wow, I know I am young but I didnt think that the online dating communities were too popular back in 98. But then again they probably were, but they werent for teeny bopers lol.

     
  • At 10:57 AM, October 29, 2007, Blogger Blah Blah Blah said…

    I'm from the TOWN!!!

    Now in nYC but a NoCal girl 'til the day I die.

    Hottubs back in the day was the date spot... I got memories from that.

    The pic in Jack London is still there.

     
  • At 7:07 PM, October 31, 2007, Blogger Bliss said…

    now as nosey as i am, i can't read all that right now. my eyes is tired. LOL

    but i WILL be back tomorrow to get all the good stuff.

    is that really you in that picture? gurlllllllllllll, reminds me of myself back in the day. i need to post one of them oldie-but-goodie- pics on my page. (cuz you know i'm one of the "down-low with the photo" people who blog. LMAO)

    chile i can't tell how me and my hubby met til after my grandma is dead and buried. maybe my daddy to. '-)

     
  • At 12:38 PM, November 02, 2007, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    What a sweet love story. My dh and I also met online in the 90s and we were both on blackplanet during the early days before it became a raunchy place to be. The internet used to be such a calm haven to meet some really wonderful folks, I guess in a sense it still is because I did meet you here :)

     
  • At 6:42 PM, November 08, 2007, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I really enjoyed this story. I LOVE it when people give all the play-by-play details in a story (guess I'm nosy).

    Anyway, I'm from the Bay, too, so I enjoyed the walk down memory lane with all of the Bay Area references!

     

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